Hold On
by Seraphine Rose
Summary: Leaning toward R for suicide, Sirius tries to make Remus see


Title: Hold on  
Rating: PG-13 to R for attempted suicide  
Author: TigeressBeam  
Disclaimer: I do not Own anything you recognize, that is JK Rowlings' brilliant work, and if I were her I would not be writing fan fiction I would be working on the 6th book! o.O "Hold On" also is not mine, I am borrowing it from Good Charlotte.  
Reviews: Review and Ill give you a cookie o.O  
  
Dark like the starless night, rising, arching high above a forest of noir and silk that spills over in a waterfall of glory and self. Stars twinkling, silver and depthless as pools frosted with moonlight, candied with every twinkling star.  
  
But you are the brightest.  
  
Son of night, named rightly for the light inside of you, sparkling in the dimmest day, and sightless night, the guide of every weary travelers eve. Such light is lost; the fog chokes me beyond the brightest lights reach, the beast devouring me, eating bit by bit through the calm face, maddening the calm golden eyes, twisting the laughing, generous grin into one of bloodlust, revealing thoughts a friend possessing a pure heart would cast out of conscious thought,  
  
Thoughts of a beast.  
  
Vicious wrath and the whisper of blood on the tongue, gnawing teeth, ripping skin from bone, devouring the carcass slowly, savoring the copper and stringy flesh rolling down the growling throat. Held down by weak restraints, caged by metal barriers, the monster screams, tearing apart the shared soul. Son of night, how unaware you are of me,  
  
Of us.  
  
Shining sliver of cold moon, wrought in steel and iron, do my bidding; cut from me this baleful demon, release me from this cage of life, from this doleful existence. Run from me, red copper and stain the pureness mocking me. Marr the image of beauty and patience gifted to me, show them my true form,  
  
End my spread of pain.  
  
This world, this world is cold  
  
But you don't, you don't have to go  
  
You're feeling sad you're feeling lonely  
  
And no one seems to care  
  
You're mother's gone and your father hits you  
  
This pain you cannot bare  
  
But we all bleed the same way as you do  
  
We all have the same things to go thru  
  
Hold on...if you feel like letting go  
  
Hold on...it gets better than you know  
  
Pale moonlight beams, sweeping into the sandy sun dusting moon-bright amber eyes, sands of time lengthening in such jewels, unageing yet growing in the ages of this world; Hidden in shadows, haunted by the chapters end, forever adorned in light, and buried in darkness.  
  
Forever shining, unknown  
  
Secreted behind a mask of placid assurance, the second half of the being beats as a separate heart, thoughts and emotions entangled in a net, strengths caged in silver bars. Moonchild, birthed to rule the mothers fullness, nurtured beneath her milky beams, dangerous monster swirled beneath the gentlest hand. Two worlds of one mind,  
  
Goods of hope, Evils of power.  
  
Endless strengths, weakened boundaries, the wolf flies free, releasing fears unexpressed through masks wrought of steel will, and iron faith. Joys of boundless skies, and rolling plains, mystery of towering pines, branches intertwining, reaching for the other in the the dark.  
  
As I reach for you Moonchild, As I reach for you.  
  
Your days you say they're way too long  
  
And your nights you can't sleep at all (hold on)  
  
And you're not sure what you're looking for  
  
But you don't want to no more  
  
And you're not sure what you're waiting for but you don't want to no more  
  
But we all bleed the same way as you do  
And we all have the same things to go through  
  
Hold on...if you feel like letting go  
  
Hold on...it gets better than you know  
  
Don't stop looking you're one step closer  
  
Don't stop searching it's not over...hold on  
  
Milky light poured liquid-like through the high arched window, spilling onto the dark encroached stone lying cold beneath the pale knees of the werewolf. The bath steamed, fragrance of lavender perfumed the air around his head, dizzying him and impairing his senses; glinting in the sliver of light, and wrought of silver and steel, a blade lay in the open palm of a tousle and tawny haired boy, his eyes filled with a madness born of grief and guilt.  
  
Blisters sprung on his fingertips, burned from the silver of the cold, heartless handle, as he poised the point above his wrist. A wild, self-satisfied smile stretched across his face, removing the fearful tears from his cheeks, detouring fresh salt drops down his pointed chin. Amber eyes slipped shut, the last breath his body would know held deep within his chest , knife poised, piercing the skin as a pin would. He pressed down slowly, slowly, until.  
  
'Clatter' gobstones fell limp from a smooth pale hand, rolling in an intricate pattern across the night cold tiles. Raising from his work, the werewolf turned fearfully to look into the starlight eyes of the wolfs oblivious mate,  
  
Sirius Black  
  
"R-Remus?" the young tween whispered, a hand reaching to pinch the taut skin of his forearm, testing the likelihood of a dream. Pain. Real pain, real shock, and a real Remus huddled over a water-filled basin, nursing a knife above his wrist. The realization of the scene before him sunk in "What the bloody hell do you think your doing?!" screeched Sirius, silver eyes flashing ominously at the smaller boy who merely gazed boredly at him,  
  
"Sleep Padfoot, the wolf never sleeps, it's found what it searches for, its mate is in its grasp and I must prevent it from claiming what it believes its own. This monster must be stopped, do you know see the evil of it, the evil of me? Try to see-"  
  
"All I see" he hissed "Is my best mate sporting a knife and a suicide attempt. Put the knife down Moony, now." The werewolf glared,  
  
"Do you not understand, the wolf has chosen, it is either death or a sleepless life; the beast earns for its mate, it cannot be, I shall not let it! I must not. To bring you and prongs, and Wormtail into the misery of my life, it is folly! If you care anything for me, leave now and forget you knew of this." Baring up beneath him, the monsters fury bubbled, its need unquenched and its soulless heart searching for the other half, feet from its grasp, the conflict between man and beast raged beneath the calm façade the man created.  
  
The wolf would not have Sirius.  
  
The demeanor, the lowliness expressed in the very words his friends echoed, frightened the suave tween. The self-hate leading Remus to commit such an act left Sirius Dumbfounded, how could he prevent such an act? Such hunger in his friends eyes, a lust known to moony but never to the man whose body the creature occupied. A lust focused finely on Sirius' own silver eyes; probing the golden depths, the solution came unbidden. Sweeping the knife from the sandy boys' blistered hand, the raven boy tilted his chin to him, pressing to the younger boys soft lush lips a kiss so tender, the thirst of moony was temporarily quenched, leaving only a wide eyed Remus to looked glazed at his best friend, Moonys' mate. Shivers like lightening jolted through moon and child of night equally, and the raven haired boy pulled back reluctantly, smiling, satisfied, at an unknown point  
  
Sirius glanced at the forgotten knife, laying innocently enough by his side, almost the cause of a lifetime of pain for the Marauders. Taking both soft, and tear wet cheeks in his slender hands, the older boy forced Remus' eyes on his own. Sharing the same breath, the same heartbeat, Padfoot whispered,  
  
"It is no folly what we decide, Marauders to the end, as we promised. We love you Moony, wolf, nor monster changes why we stay with you, you are not a monster but a being of both worlds, having two pairs of eyes to see, and two sets of sense to bare. This," glaring at this knife in distaste "will end nothing, but begin an end for us. Prongs, Wormtail, me, you brought us together Moonchild, and with you we will stay together." Whimpering, Remus cried hopelessly,  
  
"Moony.Mate..Sirius, do you not understand?" Gentle finger pressed softly to his lips, silencing him,  
  
"I do..Love..If it is indeed the will of Mr. Moony, then I shall say this. I love you Remus Lupin, and I swear to Merlin if you ever attempt this again, Prongs and Wormtail will have a hand in tying you to something until you come to your senses." Tearful, the young werewolf wrapped his arms tight around the older boys' waist. Smiling lovingly, Sirius stroked the soft sandy hair, whispering,  
  
"Hold on to us Moony, hold on."  
  
What are you looking for?  
  
What are you waiting for?  
  
Do you know what you're doing to me?  
  
Go ahead...what are you waiting for?  
  
Hold on...if you feel like letting go  
  
Hold on...it gets better than you know  
  
Don't stop looking you're one step closer  
  
Don't stop searching it's not over...  
  
Hold on...if you feel like letting go  
  
Hold on...it gets better than you know...hold on 


End file.
